Dreambaby #2 Pregnancy BUMP PHOTO! (week 33)

First of all, I just want to say this photo looks nothing like me.

33 weeks!

I mean, it is me, but it doesn’t look like me. My hair is big and it looks like I have hairy ears. Neither are true. Truly. Kenton is cute! He’s drinking milk and wearing cute “big boy” PJ’s! Look at Kenton! Kenton and the bump. Divert your attention from that random face at the top. In fact, wait… here’s a better picture…


Whew. That’s better.

In other news, this 33rd week of pregnancy is also the CRAZIEST week on my calendar… here, let’s take a peek:

  • MONDAY
    • 8:00 AM – set the crockpot on low, pray it doesn’t blow up the house
    • 8:15 AM – drop Kenton off with Mom for the day
    • 8:15-9:00 – drive downtown, through traffic, for first day of teaching
    • 9:00-9:30 – drive around in circles looking for parking, start to cry
    • 9:30-10:30 – park in metered parking, rush into building, utter many curses for not throwing deodorant in purse, madly make sure everything is in order for class, see that 90% is not
    • 10:30 – race down and feed meter, stop for Braxton Hicks
    • 10:30-12:00 – teach (at least this part went well)
    • 12:00 – let kids out early, race down and feed meter, stop for more BH
    • 12:00-1:00 – try to sort out university IT issues
    • 1:15-2:00 – race to appointment
    • 2:00-3:00- appointment
    • 3:00-3:15 – race to OB office for a MINOR OF ALL MINOR issues that they asked you to “rush” in for
    • 3:15 -arrive on time for OB appointment
    • 3:50 – get called back for 3:15 appointment
    • 4:00 – race out of OB office with that “I told you so” look – RACE to meet mom at 4:00 for Kenton’s swim lesson
    • 4:15 – arrive, 15 min late, to fill out paperwork for Kenton’s first swim lesson
    • 4:29 – Jason arrives to get in the pool with Kenton
    • 4:30-5:00 – wave and blow kisses at adorable son screaming in delight throughout his swim lesson
    • 5:00-5:10 – change Kenton out of swimsuit into dry clothes, race after his naked little body that escaped (twice!) mid-change
    • 5:10-5:20 – race home
    • 5:20-6:00 – serve dinner from the crockpot to mom, Jason, yourself and Kenton (the few bites he’ll actually eat, anyway)
    • 6:00-6:15 – ride with mom to event at church
    • 6:15-7:00 – “rehearse” skit for church event, when actually there is no rehearsing – only chatter with friends you haven’t seen for a while.
    • 7:00 – panic when you see 250+ people have shown up for event and you never rehearsed your skit
    • 7:15 -7:25 – perform “skit” completely ad-libbed, find power in yourself to continue when people actually laugh
    • 7:25-8:00 – politely sit through remainder of event, try to keep eyes open while suffering utter exhaustion
    • 8:00-9:15 – attempt to leave event, but are not successful for more than an hour despite nabbing a seat near the exit, catch up with friends and mom’s friends, try to keep eyes open while suffering utter exhaustion, shift weight back and forth in desperate attempt to relieve tired/sore feet
    • 9:15-9:30 – hitch ride home from Mom
    • 9:30 – LIGHTS OUT!
    • 9:30-??? – toss and turn all night, no sleeping
  • TUESDAY
    • 5:40 – wake when Kenton wakes
    • 5:40-9:00 – try to stay awake, feed Kenton, play with Kenton, chase Kenton, appease Kenton, keep Kenton from torturing the dog, cry tears of joy when he shows sure-fire signs of taking a morning nap, drink more than the allotted amount of caffeine during pregnancy, pray the baby in the belly doesn’t grow a second head
    • 9:00-10:30 – Kenton naps, madly start cleaning house for guests later that evening
    • 10:30 – wake Kenton, put a smoothie under his nose because you forgot to wake him earlier and actually give him a decent snack
    • 10:40 – load Kenton (with smoothie) into car, drive to gym
    • 10:55 – drop Kenton off in childcare, celebrate the fact he actually waves bye-bye now and doesn’t cry
    • 11:00 – see an old friend and catch up for a few
    • 11:10 – show up ten minutes late for personal training. WHOOPSIES.
    • 11:10-12:00 – have butt squarely kicked by personal trainer, beg her to stop torture, give the evil eye when she laughs
    • 12:00-12:15 – limp to locker room, change clothes, deodorant (no shower, because… nah…), realize you have a crazy craving for Chic-Fil-A, also realize you left wallet at home.
    • 12:15-12:30 – rescue Kenton from child care, race home, grab wallet, head to Chic-Fil-A
    • 12:30-1:00 – satisfy craving, snicker watching Kenton blow kisses at little girls, tolerate the guy one table over telling you how your life is going to be hell for the next FIVE YEARS because your kids will be so close together
    • 1:00-1:30 – grocery shop, stop every 10 seconds, roughly, for old ladies to ogle over Kenton
    • 1:30 – hit up McDonald’s drive through for a chocolate shake, because… heck… you had a hard workout and fried chicken just didn’t cut it
    • 2:00 – get home, catch Kenton rubbing his eyes, celebrate the early arrival of the afternoon nap
    • 2:10 – put Kenton down for nap, lay down yourself and attempt to rest
    • 2:15-3:00 – lay down with eyes closed listening to Kenton alternate between playing and screaming bloody murder on the monitor
    • 3:00 – give up hope of afternoon nap
    • 3:00-4:30 – entertain Kenton, simultaneously attempt to clean house for impending guest arrival
    • 4:30-7:00 – smother husband with kisses when he gets home early to mop the floor for you, feed family leftovers, bathe Kenton, hand Kenton to husband, half-heartedly attempt to freshen up
    • 7:00-9:00 – welcome guests, entertain, eat dessert (they brought – because you’ve learned you just can’t do it all), try to keep eyes open while suffering utter exhaustion
    • 9:00 – say goodbye to last guest, race upstairs, LIGHTS OUT
    • 9:00-??? – toss and turn, no sleep (2nd night in a row!)
  • TODAY
    • 5:00 – wake before Kenton
    • 5:00-6:00 – get ready
    • 6:00-6:30 – Kenton wakes, demands silly things like attention, diaper change and food – attend to those needs
    • 6:30 – Mom arrives to take care of him, offer instructions for the day
    • 6:45-7:15 – leave house, race to Starbucks, race to friend’s house
    • 7:15 – meet at friend’s house, help load car, offer outfit advice for her upcoming TV appearance
    • 7:30-8:00 – drive to TV station
    • 8:00-9:00 – prep kitchen for her segment on local TV show, offer last minute advice, remind host you used to work with her when you were just out of college, warmly accept host’s blank stare as a compliment you weren’t too much trouble back then
    • 9:00-10:00 – silently cheer on friend from off-camera as she rocks the house during her segments, take photo during commercial break:
    • 10:00-10:20 – madly drive to campus, pray parking will suddenly appear
    • 10:20 – find metered parking, race to class
    • 10:30-12:15 – teach
    • 12:15 – run down to feed meter, stop for Braxton Hicks
    • 12:15-2:15 – work in office on campus
    • 2:15-2:45 – drive back to ‘hood
    • 2:45 – bang trim appointment
    • 3:00-4:00 – race home, work on this here blog post
    • 4:15 – meet mom for Kenton’s swim lesson
    • 4:30-5:00 – take Kenton through swim lesson #2
    • 5:00-5:10 – change him, hope no naked escape attempts occur
    • 5:15-6:30 – dinner out with family
    • 6:30 – put Kenton to bed, follow accordingly
    • 6:30-???? – sleep like a baby

Sheesh. No wonder I’m EXHAUSTED.

About Michelle Fortin

Michelle Fortin is a follower of Jesus, a wife and a mom. She's also an award winning broadcast journalist and public relations professional. Michelle spent nearly a decade working in television newsrooms across the country, both behind and in front of the camera. Training future broadcast journalists in her faculty associate roles at the Walter Cronkite School of Journalism at Arizona State University and at Arizona Christian University was a cherished focus of her post-TV career. Today, she maintains a roster of public relations clients focused on empowering fellow “momprenuers.” She also serves as a speaker for various women's and mom's events. Michelle received her bachelor’s degree from Biola University and Master of Mass Communication (MMC) from Arizona State University. She and her husband, two young kids and English bulldog call Scottsdale, Arizona, home.

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